Having "Human Moments"

Human Moments

Although I've always been an advocate of affirmations and more so "positive thinking", I now have grown to realize that this is such a challenge for some and totally unreachable for others!  It takes a lot of hard work to remain in this mind frame, which, basically, ... if its to much hard work and no longer seems fun, people just won't do it!  They give up, most give up too quickly unfortunately, but hey ... we're all individuals!

As much as we TRY to remain positive, we all have times where we notice negative thoughts creeping in.  It seems best to just allow them to pass through with acceptance and without judging ourselves (which is one of the hardest things to do ... that dam old Judgement!).  When you try to suppress or force yourself to change your feelings, and the more you try to push them away, the more they push back.  Try instead to just allow it all to flow through, (just be an observer of it), without the judgement and you will find that the thoughts and emotions will pass.  If you can keep the judgement aspects out of it, you will find that they will pass a lot faster.  As a result, the right path unfolds in a totally natural way, letting you be who you truly are without beating yourself up for having that "human moment"!

Statements like "negative thoughts attracts negativity in life" aren't necessarilly true, I still think it doesn't always help, but it can make people who are going through a challenging time feel even worse.Put them into even more of a depressed state.  It can also create a fear that they're going to attract even more neagativity with their thoughts.  Creating this viscious catch 22!  

Using this idea and these statements discriminates against people and often makes them feel "bad" for "creating and attracting such things into their lives, and that's just not true.  If we start to believe that it's our negative thoughts that are creating our unpleasant situations, we can become paranoid about what we're thinking and that would make life totally unpleasant for us if we second guessed ourselves constantly, not to mention mental draining, leading us to physical symptoms brought on by the stress of it all.  I'm exhausted just thinking about that!

The problem really isn't just the thoughts ... it's the EMOTIONS that comes with the whole thing!  Emotions play a critical part in our behaviors and physical stressers in our body.  As I said above, IF you can be the Observer and just let that negativitiy flow through you instead of ingesting it all, it would help a lot.  One trick I learned years ago, is to make a physical sentence up in our imagination.  See it written out on a blackboard and stand back and just look at that sentence.  That's one way to learn to be an observer!  So ... it's not our negative thoughts that make us sick or attract bad things.  Relax!  Quit beraiding yourself over it. BUT ... it is the EMOTIONS that go along with it!

It's also not the case that attracting positive things is simply about keeping upbeat.  It can't be said strongly enough, but our feelings about ourselves are actually the most important barometer for determning the condition of our lives.  In other words, being true to ourselves is more important than just tring to stay positive!

I allow myself to feel negative things that may sometimes upset me because it's much better to experience real emotions (and let them pass through you), than to bottle them up.  Once again, it's about allowing what you're actually feeling, rather than fighting against it.  The very act of permitting without judgement is an act of self love.  This is actually an act of kindness towards yourself and goes much futher in creating a joyful life than pretending to be and to trying to feel optimistic all the time.  How exhausting!

We've all seen people who are always "upbeat and positive and kind and, and, and", but their world is crumbling all around them and we may think, See?  This "being positive" thing is crap.  But here's the real isue:  we don't know that person's inner dialogue.  We don't know what other people are telling themselves day after day, or whether they're emotionally happy.  And most important, we don't know whether they love and value themselves!

I can't express it enough, it is so important not to have judgement and fear towards yourself.  Your outer life is actually a relection of your inner state.  It's not important if you're having a bad day or a bad week (once again ... that seems to be the human component of who we are).  It's more important how you're feeling about yourself while your facing this day or week.  It's about sitting back, observing and trusting the process, having faith in yourself.  We all have bad times and not being afraid to feel anxiety, sadness, or fear, rather than suppressing everything until those emotions pass, or more likely ingested, will help you out the most!  It's about allowing yourself to be true to who YOU ARE.  If this is the way you can be, you'll find the negative feelings will dissipate and occur less and less frequently.

Because of this "positive thought" revolution ... we question ourselves continually, judge ourselves and we suppress our upsetting emotions a lot, because we believe they would attract more negativity into our life. In addition, we don't want to concern others, so we try to control our thoughts and force ourselves to be positive.  But you have to understand that the key is to always honour who you truly are and allow youself to be in your own truth.  

If you feel you can follow a certain system effortlessly, or if it's fun, that's great!  But the minute it starts to be hard work or you feel like it's a means of controlling your emotions or thoughts, it probably won't work very well for you.  The state of just "allowing seems like the place where most positive changes can occur.  Let yourself be YOU.  Embrace all that makes you feel alive.

I do believe though that the best thing is to consciously "try" to keep yourself uplifted ... and yes, this does take "conscious effort" at times (sometimes more than others, we are human!).  We have to really try to keep ourselves uplifted and do what makes us feel happy.  Do it!!!